Wedding dan pokok pussy
I like reading books, OK I lied, I just abhor the idea of flipping through pages, I find it more excruciating when you are actually so excited for the fact that you have read 2/3 of the books based on your general estimation based on the thickness of the pages which are decorated with koyak-koyak and also lipatan-lipatan halus.
Should I call it a modern apparatus for torturing?
OK, mengarut, yesterday evening, I attended yet another wedding. I just wonder the maximum capacity of a human to attend a wedding. It seems like the limit is none to mama and ayah, they have this scavenger hunt for wedding almost every week. I tell you, these people are the next competitor to Katherine Heigl in 27 dresses. Very serious and passionate wedding aficionado Superwedlover perhaps? I shoudl just call them that.
Talking about the wedding, the venue was the massive fat ass hall in Section 7, Shah Alam. Yes people, that dewan we take exam at. The hall is just fat ass huge, the entire time I was wondering how the groom and bride going to make sure the hall doesn't look empty. In my head I was making plans for them, in very systematic form, yes in bullet list :
To my horror, the hall was actually full. They had the wedding ala banquet style, together kita muntah kedarah style with the food presentation and the head steward running at random direction trying to make sure all the tables are with people of all colors and style. Being used to normal Malay wedding, I dress rather dismal, very SACC Mall style with $5 Padini collared shirt and Forever 21 Men Jeans and my olive sandals.
I was in a fashion shocked, people were dressing to impress, the groom and bride, well make that plural, its a double wedding, were of Indian Muslim, hence there were a lot of Sarees, I bet expensive ones for sure. Gold, mustard, silver, green every colors in the world, I on the other hand, look like I just got back from a pasar malam. To make thing worst, we came at 8.00pm the ceremony started at 7.30pm so we had to walk down the red carpet, whilst 1800 people staring at us disbelieved. Dalam hati mereka mesti mencarut-mencarut,
Yang penting, bau bunga seroja semerbak. Tak tahan you all.
Balik pergi Tesco. Jumpa,
P/s : RIP Miss Whitney. Walaupun rambut kau kejung tapi suara kau meletup.
Well mine even worst because I literally take my book to sleep, sandwiching it in between my legs and in the morning it becomes a shipwrecked, busuk betul buku aku. Don't forget the sambal kicap and sambal tumis stain all over the pages. The excruciating part would be when the book become less and less exciting because the writer keep quoting stories from different chapters which I don't f remember reading.
So should I read and make notes atau buat muka konfiden sambil angguk-angguk kepala walhal tak tau benda?
God bless me.
On lighter notes, my abhorrence to wedding has yet to change. I find wedding day somewhat too unreal in a away. The idea that you dress in some traditional clothes, made of some plastic-y material that make you body bloody itchy the entire time and usually in neon colored hue is just torturing, unless you are bloody rich you can afford dresses by Vera Wang or Monique Lhuillier.
Should I call it a modern apparatus for torturing?
OK, mengarut, yesterday evening, I attended yet another wedding. I just wonder the maximum capacity of a human to attend a wedding. It seems like the limit is none to mama and ayah, they have this scavenger hunt for wedding almost every week. I tell you, these people are the next competitor to Katherine Heigl in 27 dresses. Very serious and passionate wedding aficionado Superwedlover perhaps? I shoudl just call them that.
Talking about the wedding, the venue was the massive fat ass hall in Section 7, Shah Alam. Yes people, that dewan we take exam at. The hall is just fat ass huge, the entire time I was wondering how the groom and bride going to make sure the hall doesn't look empty. In my head I was making plans for them, in very systematic form, yes in bullet list :
- Jarakkan meja setengah batu antara satu sama lain, so it can fill up the empty spaces in between.
- Have this rules that people are to mingle in distance of satu or dua depa in between them.
- Put the bloody huge marry go round in the middle of the hall.
- Pay people in random Mamak shops to just fill up the hall, macam pelakon tambahan gitu. Pak pacak.
- Invitation are strictly to people of gedang almari dua pintu size only.
I was in a fashion shocked, people were dressing to impress, the groom and bride, well make that plural, its a double wedding, were of Indian Muslim, hence there were a lot of Sarees, I bet expensive ones for sure. Gold, mustard, silver, green every colors in the world, I on the other hand, look like I just got back from a pasar malam. To make thing worst, we came at 8.00pm the ceremony started at 7.30pm so we had to walk down the red carpet, whilst 1800 people staring at us disbelieved. Dalam hati mereka mesti mencarut-mencarut,
"Apahal cina bukit gedang ni berjalan catwalk dekat red carpet dengan suave bagai. Kau ingat kau siapa? Jet Li? Saloma? Dahlah pakai baju macam pergi bazar ramadan lepas tu boleh pula masuk fashionably late."The wedding was simple, and nice. The cliche and overplayed wedding songs (read Maher Zain) were blasted in their air. I knew every words to it, so it was a karaoke moment for me. Just that the food presentation anthem was somewhat inappropriate, they had this very club-ish music accompanying them. After the zikir, marhaban and whats not, followed by the entire album of Maher Zain, music ala Armin van Buuren's trance could definitely cause you a severe heart attack, tak pun sawan gila babi.
Yang penting, bau bunga seroja semerbak. Tak tahan you all.
Balik pergi Tesco. Jumpa,
Tesco jual pokok pussy?
OK bye.
P/s : RIP Miss Whitney. Walaupun rambut kau kejung tapi suara kau meletup.
